Rethinking your relationship with alcohol? Benefits and how to try being sober curious

You don’t have to give up alcohol completely to take a closer look at how it fits into your life. That idea is at the heart of the “sober curious” movement, which encourages people to drink less — or not at all — and pay attention to how they feel.

Whether you’re thinking about cutting back for your health, sleep or overall well-being, being sober curious can be a low-pressure way to rethink your relationship with alcohol.

Read on to learn where sober curiosity came from and how it may benefit you.

What does sober curious mean?

The term “sober curious” is the idea that you think before you sip on your glass of wine or pop the top on a beer can.

The goal isn’t to address a drinking problem. Instead, it can be about overall health, finding other ways to enjoy yourself or the company of others, or to save money.

You don’t have to have an alcohol use disorder for alcohol to be unhealthy for you. Alcohol use can cause problems for anyone. Heavy drinking is even worse for you.

And if you’re able to successfully cut back on alcohol, you may find yourself realizing that you don’t need to drink to have fun or interact with others. That could help you drink less alcohol in the long term.

It doesn’t need to be a permanent change

That’s the big difference between sober curiosity and permanent sobriety. The main goal is to see how you feel without alcohol — miserable, alright or even better than before — and use what you find to make meaningful adjustments in your lifestyle.

It challenges the idea that your only choices are drinking or never drinking again. People with alcohol dependence may still need to avoid alcohol completely. Otherwise, taking a break may help you learn how difficult or easy it is to go without.

What is Sober October or Dry January?

Dry January and Sober October are challenges that encourage people to take a break from alcohol for a full month.

For some, these challenges offer a way to reset after a period of heavier drinking. For others, they offer a chance to notice how drinking less affects sleep, mood, energy, and overall health. They can also be an easy way to explore being sober curious without making a long-term commitment.

Both challenges allow you to see whether you’re drinking too much. If you aren’t able to take a break successfully, that may mean you need to see a doctor about alcohol dependence.

But the reverse is not necessarily true. Successfully stopping alcohol for a month does not mean you’re free of risk. Some people can avoid alcohol for a month and then immediately return to heavy drinking.

What does a sober curious lifestyle look like?

A sober curious lifestyle looks different for everyone. It may mean choosing alcohol-free drinks at social events, setting limits on how often you drink, or taking regular breaks from alcohol. The goal isn’t necessarily to stop drinking forever. Instead, it’s about being more intentional about when and why you drink and noticing how alcohol affects your physical and emotional well-being.

Any time before you reach for a drink, you may ask yourself if it’s really necessary and what it might contribute. The more you do this, the more you may find out about yourself.

People often start to have trouble with alcohol when drinking becomes something they do without thinking.

Understanding alcohol’s effects on your body

It’s important to understand how alcohol affects our bodies, how we respond to it, and how much is too much.

In the past, we recommended no more than one drink a day for women and two drinks a day for men. Some doctors once thought that small amounts of alcohol might help heart health. But now experts believe any possible benefit is small and uncertain.

Similarly, in the past, the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism recommended people drink no more than one alcoholic drink per hour, no more than two drinks per occasion, and no more than three drinks per day. This was known as the “1-2-3 rule for drinking.” However, this guidance is outdated.

We now know that even small amounts of alcohol use have been linked to cancer risk, including a higher risk of breast cancer in women. That’s why we no longer recommend daily drinking. UT MD Anderson’s official guidance is that for cancer prevention, it’s best not to drink alcohol. If you choose to drink, be aware of the risks, aim to drink less often and have fewer drinks.

Also keep in mind that alcohol use can affect men and women differently. On average, men tend to have larger bodies and more muscle and body water than women. Because alcohol mixes with water in the body, it can affect people differently based on their body size and composition.

What are the common challenges of cutting back on alcohol consumption?

Sober curiosity will not work for someone who is dependent on alcohol. It assumes we have the control to stop drinking whenever we want. For people who are dependent on alcohol, that usually does not work. Trying to cut back can help show you whether you are able to control your drinking. If you cannot, complete abstinence may be your best option.

We used to tell patients that they are in control until they drink alcohol. For someone with alcohol dependence, the body and brain have become used to alcohol. The control you still have is whether you take that first drink. Once drinking starts, it may become very difficult to stop.

If you’re dependent on alcohol, stopping can be very difficult and may even be dangerous. So, if you’re a heavy drinker, you should seek medical guidance before stopping suddenly. Stopping suddenly can cause alcohol withdrawal, which can lead to seizures and other serious health problems.

What are the benefits of reducing alcohol consumption?

Cutting back on alcohol consumption may lower your risk of several cancers to which it’s linked, such as:

• Mouth cancer
• Throat cancer
• Esophageal cancer
• Colorectal cancer
• Head and neck cancers

In general, the more alcohol you drink, the higher your cancer risk. The link between alcohol and cancer is not new, but we now have stronger evidence showing that the more someone drinks, the greater the risk of cancer.

Cutting back may also help protect your liver from damage. Alcohol can contribute to fat buildup in the liver. Over time, this can lead to liver disease and scarring, including fibrosis and cirrhosis.

Alcohol can also contribute to high blood pressure (hypertension) and cardiovascular disease. Heavy or long-term alcohol use can affect your memory, thinking, and other brain functions.

For someone who does not already have this damage, cutting back could help prevent it. If you already have alcohol-related health problems, cutting back may help keep them from getting worse. And some effects may improve over time.

And, if you do cut back on alcohol, you may see some health benefits right away, including improvements in your sleep, mood and energy levels.

Alcohol-free activities you can try

If alcohol is a major part of your social life, you will need to find ways to have fun that don’t involve alcohol. You may enjoy sports like racing, social activities like bowling, outdoor activities like gardening, or your other hobbies.

If you’re at an event where others are drinking and you want to fit in, consider nonalcoholic beer or mocktails.

Alcohol can make some people feel more relaxed and comfortable in social situations. But you don’t need to drink to feel more relaxed.

Being sober curious gives you a chance to find out what works for you. Try going without alcohol in situations where you would normally drink, pay attention to how you feel, and use what you learn to make healthier choices going forward. You may decide to drink less, take more frequent breaks, or stop drinking altogether.

Request an appointment at UT MD Anderson online or call 1-877-632-6789.