8 ways to say, ‘Don’t smoke around me’

Trying to take better control of your health? Steer clear of secondhand smoke. 

Here’s the surprising reason: The amount of many cancer-causing chemicals is even higher in secondhand smoke than it is in the smoke inhaled by smokers. Why? Because the term “secondhand smoke” encompasses both: 

• the smoke exhaled by smokers after puffing on a cigar, cigarette or pipe AND  
• the smoke that drifts away from their burning tobacco. 

Both types of smoke contain more than 7,000 chemicals, including 70 known to cause cancer. As a result, nearly 7,300 non-smokers die of lung cancer in the United States each year. 

But even limited exposure to secondhand smoke can cause heart disease and trigger a heart attack. And, if you have cancer, secondhand smoke can make your cancer treatments, including chemotherapy, less effective. 

So, how can you tell someone not to light up around you? Here’s how some of MD Anderson's Facebook followers and other friends from around the web take charge of their health. Get inspired by their strategies for asking a smoker to snuff out. 

Mention specific medical conditions  

“My neighbor was smoking, and the smoke would drift into my studio. I explained that I was getting headaches from the smoke and that it was really becoming a problem. She apologized and said she would not smoke indoors anymore.” 

—Janet R. 

“When I’m standing in line with a smoker, I gently say (with a smile), ‘I’m allergic to smoke. Would you be willing not to smoke for now?’ Then give them a huge thank you. It has worked well for me for years.” 

—Judy W.  

“I found that just asking them to move doesn’t work, as most of the time they don't care. What does work is telling them I'm allergic to it. I’m not really, but it is the best solution I've found so far!” 

—Kelli E. 

Let your actions do the talking 

“People don't like being told what to do, so I don't tell them they can’t smoke around me. If they light up, I simply say, ‘I don't like to be around cigarette smoke. So, I'll wait for you over here.’ Then I move myself away. They are less likely to take offense and usually will accommodate my decision by either not smoking or by moving away themselves.” 

—Janet P. 

“I always quickly walk past people who smoke, with my face tucked in my shirt around my nose. Or, I use a fanning gesture with my hands. No words needed. They get the hint!” 

—Audra S. 

Frame it as a favor request  

“I might say something like ‘(Cough, cough) Excuse me, may I make a request? I'm working on keeping myself healthy lately, and smoke is especially bothersome. Would you be willing to smoke somewhere else or put out your cigarette for the time being?’” 

—Bob M. 

“When I'm with a woman, I tell people, ‘Excuse me, but my wife is pregnant. May I please ask you not to smoke around her?’ Absolutely no one has ever turned me down, and every single one of them has been extremely apologetic and kind!” 

—Dan N. 

Try emotional appeals

“I rarely put myself in any ‘smoking situations,’ but when necessary, this is how I handle it: ‘I feel very strongly about smoking and need to let you know that I cannot be with you if you will be smoking. I hope you can respect my feelings about this decision, which is emotional for me, having watched my parents die from smoking.’” 

—Sharon O. 

Call 1-800-784-8669 or text QUIT to 47848 for help quitting tobacco. MD Anderson cancer patients may also enroll for free in MD Anderson’s Tobacco Research and Treatment Program.

Maher Karam-Hage, M.D., is an addiction specialist and tobacco treatment expert at MD Anderson.